Change of Plans

I feel my life has been a series of events to bring me to this moment.  If you read my prayer journal, you will see this a lot...."Will you follow me anywhere? Will you worship Me anywhere? Even if its not considered glamorous by man's standards, if its in the quiet of your home, if its only for Me?" 

Of course I say "Yes, Lord, I love you and I only want to be where You are, no matter where that is."

For the last several years, He has been taking me to places I was not comfortable.  These experiences challenged every fruit of the spirit, my discipline, my trust in the Lord.  I continued to answer my Lord with "yes."  I'll be honest to say, it wasn't always a loud shout of confidence or joy, its not easy to be selfless or to be forced to look at your true self and motivations.  I do have to trust that wherever He leads is the best place for me.  There is no safer place than in His will and no fruitful place apart from His presence.

I have to give up my vision of His plan.  I have to deal with my desire to please man and to be found worthy by the world.  I want to be great, we all do, its a desire place there by God.  How I measure greatness must only be held against God's definition, and its not usually a place of high profile or lots of attention.

  Last week the Lord asked again, and I say "Absolutely, both feet in."  He responded "NOW, TURN HARD RIGHT!"  Seriously, it was as abrupt as I've ever experienced God.

As I turned, I saw a huge expanse of a room, full of an opportunity I had never seen myself in before. Looking at what lays before me I know will take extreme courage, trust, and an abundant amount of love.  All of which will never occur with out holding on tight and running hard after Jesus.  I thank the Lord He has been so gentle in the process, and I can see how He was working when I wasn't even paying attention.  He is so gentle, never pushing us farther than we can go, but its not with out challenges or discomfort.

I am human, I fight the urge to panic, to fear, and to take control, but I have confidence in the love of my Jesus, will trust and know that I don't have to know all the plans, for He is working for me.  And thus begins our home school journey.  In the quiet of my home.  "Yes Lord, I will follow you anywhere, I will worship you in the quiet of my home.  I will, because you are here and you are good"  Its not considered "glamorous" by mans standards, by all means its not a position of attention, but it is the place the Lord has called me to and in His presence there is greatness of many things.

Ephesians 3:12-21

New American Standard Bible (NASB)

¹² in whom we have boldness and ^[a]confident access through faith ^[b]in Him. ¹³ Therefore I ask ^[c]you not to lose heart at my tribulations on your behalf, ^[d]for they are your glory.
 ¹⁴ For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, ¹⁵ from whom ^[e]every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, ¹⁶ that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, ¹⁷ so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, ¹⁸ may be able to comprehend with all the ^[f]saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, ¹⁹ and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God.
 ²⁰ Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, ²¹ to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations ^[g]forever and ever. Amen.