Balancing Act

I've never been very graceful.  Me and my family often found humor in the simple act of me walking through a doorway.  It must be my depth perception or something, because that simple act seemed like the hardest task for me.  Doorways were usually accompanied with bruises, or at the very least a faint "ouch."

For me, mothering is not much different.  I'm not very graceful at this balancing act either.  By the end of the day, I've usually acquired a bump or bruise.  These are sometimes physical, I do have boys, but more often are emotional hurts, and most definitely a knock on my own pride. 

If you are a mother you've most likely read a book, or 10, hoping for an "idiots guide to mothering." -The be all guide to everything-  Since the hospital doesn't send one home, and the stork must have ran out of them long ago, we are left to find our own instructions for these little ones.  From the moment the belly shows countless, friends, family, and perfect strangers are in line, ready to tell us the best information, all from experience.  Unfortunately most of it is completely conflicting, and based on their specific situation.

For instance, I've ready before not to end your sentence with "okay?"  This is just a way to ask your child permission for the command you've just given.  -Got it!- I will now end my sentences with "understand?"  But then recently I read that you should end your sentence with "okay?"  This will let your child feel like they are in control of some situations.  Is your head spinning yet?  Mine is!

Over the last 8 years, I have found more than one of these instances.  Can you see how I'm so bruised?  I'm being tossed and turned, thrown from one idea to the next.  Experts keep telling me to use time out as punishment, time away from you is no fun.  Wait!  Don't use time out as punishment, use it as a way to calm down.  Huh?!?!?!?!

I spend lots of time confused, changing my game plan, no consistency, my kids have no idea what mom they will wake up to in the morning.  This is no good for any of us.  Really, all I'm hoping for is someone to step in and do all this dirty work for me.  Any chance of any of you will come over between 5 and 10 times a day to take care of this?  I'll pay you in baked goods.  I didn't think so.

But there is a solution.  Its the best book out there.  I rarely think to look there.  I'm not sure why.  Its the most widely read, most widely circulated book to date.  The Bible.  No, really.  There is TONS of parenting advice in there.  Ever read Proverbs, or Philippians?  They may not give specific strategies, but "a gentle answer turns away wrath" is pretty good advice.  Then there is one more thing I do not use nearly enough.  The Holy Spirit.  Do I ask God to speak to me when I'm in a bind, or do I pick up "How to Have a New Kid by Friday?"  Its a great book, but Dr. Leaman, no matter how much school he's had, will never know Jack personally.  But guess what, God made Jack, He made me Jack's mother, and I bet He knows how both of us work best. 

This is not the easy answer, or nearly as convenient as paying my friends in brownies to come and discipline my kids, but nothing about parenting is convenient.  Even fun takes work, ever been on vacation?  But if I'm willing to put the time in now, take the time to listen to God when I'm having troubles, tomorrow will likely be more enjoyable.